My sister really gave me a pleasant surprise. When my dad came back, he was loaded with CHOCOLATES, BISCUITS, SNACKS AND CLOTHES. All from London. And it's like A LOT until I can't decide what to eat. (okay, maybe lesser than my holiday trip when we nearly brought back an entire chocolate store) I was delighted to hear when my sister bought a shirt for me. BUT, it was not one, not two, but seven! I was like *jaw drop*. She really knows my kind of taste and my size. And it's like all the exotic shirts (more exotic than yours john! haha.). I really like clothes from London, but they usually cost a bomb. Topman comes from there! I really must get used to wearing the exotic shirts my sister bought from the usual plain t-shirts.



Just before my sister left.



ALL MINE!!! (not all actually ): )
Posted at 10:25 PM 0 comments




Yes! I finally got my Life Application Study Bible!!! It's supposed to my birthday present from my parents. First time buying my own birthday present. LOL. Actually not. I still remember in sec1 I bought my own birthday present too! A hamster cage it was. -.-" Can't wait to start reading it!!

I didn't managed to get any teachers to tell us our results today, sadly. We'll be getting all our results back on monday. Exciting. (Okay, maybe not)

Miss Sharma said that our geog results were the most disappointing set of results she has ever came across. And I can't blame her for that (since last year's cohort had 100% distinctions for O's). The population question literally killed the geog cohort. We selected the wrong question to do. She's expecting C5s and C6s from us and very few passed that question. She kept stating that we were unprepared when we came into the exam, studying the bare minimum and also implyed that we were taking geog lightly and focusing on our combined humanities.

I felt that implication was rather unfair. Okay, I know I studied only the minimum chapters. But hey, I studied the most out of the time I had, I even started 3weeks before, and it was because of my sister's flight I didn't manage to study finish. And I think I put in excetional effort, based on the amount of time (at least 40hours). She even said to me in a not so happy tone "Jonathan..still say the paper easy and can do, when I marked your script it was horrible." (or somewhere along that line) Ahhh. Nevermind. At most go Mac's work for first three months. HAHA.

Anyway, let's all wait for monday and really enjoy our weekends before monday. Don't worry too much since it's already over. I know no matter how badly I do, I would still go to a place God already called me to. That's enough assurance for me. :)
Posted at 4:38 PM 0 comments




Yes, today marks the end of the prelims. The toughest exam I have ever sat for physically, mentally and emotionally. It was the worst period of my life I have gone through. It really strips all self-reliance and increases my dependency on God.

Never before have I fallen sick during an exam period, in fact my stomach gave me problems for 2weeks. Adding to that, I had insomnia everyday with the exception of a few days, and the feeling was really bad. I had to get over many letdowns and setbacks. But, I emerged a stronger being, just like how a butterfly struggles to break out of its tightly-bounded cocoon.

To me, I felt that I have cleared the highest hurdle for now, crossed the deepest ocean and I'm prepared to face the final test - the O levels. Seriously, I was more worried about my prelims then the O's. That's because I know that being in a school like Victoria, they won't go easy on the examinations.

Through this exam, I understood what it meant by failure. Failure is necessary for growth. Failing is better than not trying. I read on failure from a christian book gave as a birthday gift. It's about how you respond and move on from that failure that matters.

History paper was a failure in my perspective. THAT by itself, pushed me way beyond my capabilities, against all odds and to trust in the one above for my geography paper. All odds were against me, with my sister leaving during that period, hindering my studying times. And yes, I broke my 12hours study record, this time it's 13hours in a day. But I wanted to go for 15 actually. In the end, the biggest risk I took for studying the minimal chapters for geography paid off. But I will never try it again.

Bottomline is, I went through a tough time but emerged a stronger person spiritually, mentally and emotionally. Thank you God. :)

Now, time to take a break. I'm going to catch a movie and have my well-deserved rest before starting again tommorrow.
Posted at 11:11 AM 0 comments




I woke up in the middle of the night just now. And chemical equations and reations (reduction of the haemetite blah blah) just started to bombard my head. Soon I was at it for about an hour to two hours. THEN, I realised I was having a geography paper NOT a chemistry paper. HAHA. But it still continued on. In the end, I decided to go to my parent's room and sleep since my dad's away with my sis. I have been having insomnia for the past 2weeks. I remembered only getting to sleep quickly ONCE. I can't wait for the prelims to be over so I won't be experiencing such torture. The worst one I had was on the night before my Emaths paper2. I couldn't sleep from 1030pm-3am. Beat that. :P

Last night, my sister left for London. She's going there to study Fine Arts and Art History (if I'm not wrong) at Goldsmith University. I guess my family is rather fortunate to have two people who get overseas education. My dad's the other. As expected, people came and asked me when would be my turn? In my heart I knew there was no chance of studying overseas, because by then my parents would be broke from my sister's exhorbitant fees. And poor jonathan has to study local. LOL. Not like I wanted to study overseas in the first place. My sis better paint some mona lisa back or something when she returns! Haha.

These few days I got to know some of the youth leaders from her church (which was my previous church), her closer friends I presumed. They were quite active and those make a lot of noise kind (which is good)! No wonder my sister's so crazy at times. I think her best friend (I'm guessing) was the most alike to my sister. Her friends treated me very nice and got one guy ask me to study hard for my geog. But I think I was too shy and didn't really respond back. =X

I also met some unexpected people at the airport. I was hoping that Pastor Yew Lin would come, but I think she had something on. She was my children ministry pastor (if I remember correctly) when I was in primary school. A lot of her friends came, that was excluding most of her VJC friends.

Soon, it was time for her to leave. I didn't really talk to her as she was entertaining her friends, though I wished I could. This feeling of sending someone close off is a first-time. I guess I would miss her till she next comes back in June. I would certainly miss competing with her for the toilet, going into her room, etc. I'm really thinking what it would be like in the next 9 months. Only time will tell. Okay time to study geog. All the best sister!
Posted at 6:36 AM 0 comments




I'm prepared to face the worst. I can forget about VJC for first three months, and not even think about going to SAJC as a backup. I have never before made so many severe mistakes in my papers. And this time it's talking about close to 10marks per mistake. History's gone already, I realised I answered both parts of my SEQ and my SBQ wrongly. THREE grades gone. Nevermind. First three months can widen my social circle of friends in other schools. LOL. I'm still thinking which JC can I make it to since VJC and SAJC are out of the picture.

Nevermind. I still have ONE more subject. HOD of humanities told all of us to study for it because we need it to salvage our l1r5. (She was trying to imply our comb. humanities did very badly)

Time is seriously not on my side. My sister's leaving tonight, meaning I can't study much. Events these few days too. So many people visiting my sister these days. It's getting hard to focus. No, I must tell myself it's not!

Nevermind. Faith and trust.
Posted at 12:48 PM 0 comments




Question spotting is so fun. I observed the trends from previous years' questions and came up with my list for prelims. I predicted that Qn1-Impact of WW1 Qn2-End of WW2+Peace Settlements Qn3-End of Communism (okay, this was tipped off).

AND THEY REALLY CAME OUT. ALL IN THE SAME ORDER.

But... too bad I studied the chapters very generally except for gorbachev due to the hint. I didn't do that either. History paper was kind of difficult. The questions set were very deceiving, looks simple but difficult. I totally misread one question. Luckily I realised halfway through and cancelled half a page's worth of answers. And I just have to say one thing - HAHA.

Mr Chan told me I made careless mistakes for my maths paper. It was like "123 write as 321" in his own words. Ahh. I was expecting double A1s from both maths. Nevermind! I'm still confident. I hope the 25marks buffer serves to save me.

And to those who haven't already know. There was a VERY BIG mistake in our amaths paper. ONE part of a question could not be solved, and they're giving the marks if we solved the first part. According to mr chan. I'm still wondering how could that happen in a school prelim paper - a question that cannot be solved. Unfortunately, there would be a handful of people who wasted their time doing it compromising their other answers. I think I was one of them. Haha.

Tommorrow's the chemistry paper. I must do well and not let miss lyana down! After all the efforts she made to teach me chemistry which I couldn't really understand (most of the chapters initially). I just learnt how to count the number of protons and electrons last month only okay? LOL.
Posted at 11:55 AM 0 comments




I feel so accomplished! Yesterday I broke my 9.5hours in a day study record.

I studied for 12hours in total!

Hahahaha. 4hrs-Geog 3.5hrs-Hist 4.5hrs-Chem.

And when I study is really never do anything else but just sit there and focus! I feel so great after saturday's revelation. Now can study in peace. I guess I also felt guilty I didn't study much the previous day so I had to study more. Too bad studying long hours does not give you good grades instanteously.

AND...

I created a new catchy (but corny) phrase/s to remember the reactivity series of metals. It goes like this..

Please Stop Copying My Answers! Zebra Is Loving Hot Climate Surprisingly.

At least it's better than remembering, it in this order-

Potassium
Sodium
Calcium
Magnesium
Aluminium
Zinc
Iron
Lead
Hydrogen
Silver


Posted at 1:44 PM 0 comments




Today during worship in youth service, I realised something. Something so simple, yet I somehow forgot about it in the hustle and bustle of life. It was not more of me realising it, but i felt it was what God wanted to tell me.

He told me that He was always there with me, watching me, by my side. I began to picture my usual self - a solitude figure sitted on a white wooden chair, in a spacious bright room sprawled with books all over the floor, busy studying at my books. It was like any other studying sessions I had at home.

He was there with me. I was unaware of His presence. All the times I felt so lonely in that room, digging my face in the sea of endless books and the everest of papers. The times I felt so hopeless and lost. The times I felt so down and wanted to break down. The times I so badly wanted to talk to somebody because I couldn't take it. He was always there beside me. He was always there comforting me, strengthening me even while I thought I was suffering alone by myself. I was unaware of it.

But today, I realised how much He has helped me through, how much He comforted me. How He was always there beside me even though I was unaware of it. I couldn't help but stand in awe and worship the one who loved me so much. And He loves you too. You don't have to be perfect or flawless to have Him as your friend.

God doesn't condemn anybody but accepts anyone who is willing to accept Him into his life. Many people think they have to be a goody person or a sinless person to befriend God. But fortunately, that's not true. The transformation of lost lives to ones which bear much hope and future are certainly the evidence of His acceptance and changing power. I was once lost. I was once vuglar, rebellious, angry and many more. But now I'm found in Him, and is no more.

"Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me."
-Psalms 23:4

Thank you God. Now I feel much more peace in my heart when I study.
Posted at 11:08 PM 0 comments




I do not understand what joy teachers derive out of setting difficult papers. And it just had to be our prelims. Does seeing students panic in the middle of the examination hall, clutching tightly to their gently creased papers with anxiety saturating their minds give them an ecstatic feeling? Or setting difficult papers just to show to the other schools in Singapore that VS papers are way challenging, meaning we're a good school. I certainly hope not.

Maybe teachers who set difficult papers are just misunderstood by students. Maybe, they're doing it for our own good. They want us to process our knowledge more efficiently and thus we would be well prepared for the O levels. Wow, that's nice. But wait, the O levels DOES NOT require us to apply our knowledge to such an extent. Neither do they twist questions to such an extent. Setting difficult papers drains the morale of the students. Making them feel inferior and helpless about their present condition, when in fact, comparing to national standard, they are way above the average level.

The physics prelim paper today was an example. Okay fine, maybe I'm just the one with a problem with physics. But no, the response was similar throughout the level! You can just guess how 'easy' the paper was. I was diligent and did all the VS prelim papers from 2001-2005, and I have to say this year's is the hardest. Some even said this paper is more difficult than RI's paper, and they're like the top school in Singapore? Okay fine, there'll be moderation. But even if a 50/100 gives you an A1, which will never happen, will you still feel accomplished? Even one of the top students in the level did not finish the paper!

There goes the first three months. Physics was supposed to get me somewhere, but apparently, it stabbed me in the back. I'm sorry if this post is rather offending and one-sided. But nevermind, it's only an examintation. I am moving on and not crying over spilled milk.

I better hope the remaining papers don't turn out the same way. Especially chemistry.
Posted at 1:02 PM 0 comments




I just want to thank my classmates Chang yang, Darren, Darryl, Desmond, Jansen, Jiawei, Jonathan Decruz, Junliang and anyone else that I have left out unintentionally, for the birthday present! It was a gundam model kit! I shall fix it after the exams. Thanks!

Things hasn't been going well so far.

Social studies paper was a let down. I can't believe I actually didn't write the third point for my essay. It's not that I didn't know, I just thought I didn't need to. Oh well, at least I made this costly mistake now rather than in the O's. One point in an essay is very crucial, there isn't any room to lose marks. Source-based was rather difficult as well. I didn't tell my mother that it didn't turn out well. I already knew what she would have said. "See lah! Last night eat the oreo cheesecake until you sick!" I'm just glad it's over.

It's actually quite unfair that other classes got tipped off on which questions will come out for the exams. And it really did came out. Oh well. At least I did the paper without anyone's help. :)

I really want to thank God for sustaining me through today's paper. From last night till this morning I wasn't feeling well, my stomach was giving me problems and I was unable to sleep for 2hours+. The feeling was horrible and I was deprived of sleep. But really by his grace and mercy, my stomach didn't give me problems during the exam. I'm still feeling a bit weak now, but I believe I will be healed! (Actually I think I already am)
Posted at 1:14 PM 0 comments






My belated birthday present sponsored by my sister. I guess my mom really knows what I really liked. CHOCOLATES! And that swiss biscuits. My mom chose them and my sister paid. Haha! The note was written by my mom just to make the photo look good. -.-"




I found this shot rather interesting. I was bored and alone at home, so i decided to take some shots. The long shutter speed created the special effect. Seems as if I'm transfigurating.
Posted at 1:31 AM 0 comments




Okay, here's the 'annual birthday post'.

I guess birthdays are just any other day in a year, just that it is 'your day'. That would be the definition for most people.

Birthday for me this year, wasn't any much of an improvement from last year's. I had to admit I had the worst birthday last year due to some misunderstandings. On that account, I think this year's birthday is better. But it really cannot be compared to the good old times at sentosa and wild wild wet where i spent my past birthdays with a group of close friends at that time. The Prelims are really sucking the life out of me.

I want to thank all who took the effort to send me birthday wishes and I really appreciate them. And also a particular person who made my phone vibrate non-stop. He sent me a total of 42 messages. 21 at midnight, 21 in the morning. I also would like to thank the senders of the 4message-long birthday wishes, you know who you are. Thanks! I also received a poem which is indeed quite timely. Thank you to the writer of the poem. I had to spent a total of 40minutes to reply everybody's messages. My fingers were actually quite tired after that. Haha! Thank you guys!

It took me quite a while to sleep, and had a nice chat before sleeping. After O's it shall be!

As usual, the first thing I did when the clock struck 12 was to PRAY AND SEEK GOD! Pray over my next one year and stuff. That's what I did the previous year, and indeed the past year has been filled with endless joys and blessings. The next thing I did was to whip up my camera and take a shot of 'THE LEGO MAN'. Yeah! Sounds lame. You will see more of him here in this blog in the time to come.

I had breakfast with Darren at Kovan Mac's. Apparently the '24hr' Hongkong Cafe was closed and only opens at 11am. How ironic. Wanted to have some thick toast for breakfast. We had a nice chat. Unfortunately, he had to leave for school.

Then, came the bad part. I went home and all I did was to STUDY and SLEEP. How nice. Haha. I guess things didn't go the way I wished it would go. Higher hopes equates to Greater letdown. My magic formula. I realised studying is VERY BORING. Especially when you spent like ten hours on the same topic and you're only halfway through. I studied till I realised I didn't have the mood to study. I've been clocking at least 8-9 hours everyday for the past 2weeks (excluding saturdays). BUT, I'm doing this for my own good, just like how parents' would tell their kids.

I was hoping to eat ice cream for my birthday! Those Ben and Jerry's, Higan Diaz and Swensen's type. This craving within me. Finally, someone wanted to make my wish come true. However, things turned ugly. There was some miscommunication. AGAIN. History never fails to repeat itself. This time it was between me and my mother. I had to go against my will and reject them. And I'm not one who likes rejecting people. Somemore I had already agreed to it.

Yes, we quarrelled. It totally turned my sian mood into a rather annoyed mood. Thankfully, things turned out better. She apologised. I agreed to go out with my family for dinner in the end. My mom tried to make my mood better by offering me incentives to do well for my exams. It was $150 for an A1 and $100 for an A2 for the O's. She said I was to use that money to buy the camera I wanted. A more advanced camera with manual functions and all to whet my appetite for photography. I think I would be more happy about my results than a new camera if I managed to attain my desired grade.

In the end, I managed to get my ice cream. Atmosphere of the family was nice. Even after a major quarel broke out among us. The ice cream shop was kind of funky, trendy and hip. A place for the young. That came after dinner at Chomp Chomp Food Centre in Serangoon Gardens. The ice cream was nice. One of the ice cream I ordered was a scoop of cookies and cream ice cream with a shot of liqueur. Bailey's it was. Delectable it was. I think I'm starting to have an addiction for liqueur. I better stop!

And yes, so that's the end of a rather 'interesting' birthday. Thanks to all who wished me. Appreciate it! I hope next year an end would be put to the boring birthdays streak I've been having. Sorry for sounding so whiny and spoilt.



Look at that shot of liqueur in the test tube!
Posted at 9:43 PM 0 comments





Posted at 8:38 PM 0 comments

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Jonathan Tan

'just another dude down the street armed with a bulky black camera over his chest'

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